The best bad advice

I admit it: I thought Jezebel's "resident sexpert" was a well orchestrated prank, but given the tumble that the site has taken in the past year, a sex advice column written by someone who has to look up the meaning of "cisgendered," shouldn't come as a shock anymore. And I'm far from the only one questioning its validity. Amanda Marcotte weighed in on The Raw Story , saying of an earlier post on whether "facials" are degrading or not (note: the advice was to ignore one's inner voice that says "ew," and all things feminist-y, of course):

"Encouraging women to silence the inner voice that warns them that the man they’re dating is degrading them is really a bad, bad idea. Women do that already. In fact, the problem is that women are already socialized to ignore and minimize degrading behavior. If you convince yourself to silence that little, “That’s not cool!” voice, you’re going to attract men who belittle you, undermine you, try to control you, and even soften you up so they can abuse you. Listen to that voice! That voice is there to protect you. If a man’s behavior turns on your spidey sense, instead of telling that voice to shut up and going along to get along, stop and listen to your spidey sense."

I rag on Jezebel a lot -- they're making it really hard not to these days with banning popular contributors , locking down members who express even a hint of criticism , and continuing to publish a man who on his blog admitted that years ago he tried to kill his ex-girlfriend. Yeah, those things are bad, and to their credit, Jezebel has never been an explicitly feminist blog. Their writers have always been upfront about their flaws, and I actually did at one time appreciate the "warts and all" attitude. But what Jezebel sometimes forgets is that they are a lot of young women's entry into feminism, and with that should come some sort of responsibility. Or at least a counterpoint post.

Social Media and Shaming

(Jezebel's Jessica Coen defending her site's decision to call-out Twitter users for using racial slurs)

Normally, I wouldn't feel any sort of conflict about shaming someone who very publicly used a racial slur after the President's re-election, but I'd be lying to say that Jezebel's decision to contact the schools of the kids who made the racist tweets makes me very, very nervous. Actually, there's a lot about this story that makes me uncomfortable, from confusing calling-out and shaming with bullying  (it's not), to the idea that those on Jezebel's side see will them as some sort of anti-racist activists when their site has historically had more than its share of race fail.

Legally, I don't think they've done anything wrong (granted, I haven't set foot in a journalism class since the Clinton Administration), but it does fall into a ethical limbo where one is prompted to ask were online and real life intersect.

Links & Bits: 12/8/11

Rich's post on the America's Next Top Model All-Star controversy . I spent an inordinate amount of time yesterday reading about this, and his one of the most lucid takes on the whole mess.

s.e. smith talks about failing at NaNoWriMo -- and why it was a good thing.

Epic Jez thread: What Ridiculous Things Did Your Believe In When You Were a Kid? I'm only a part-time Jezzie these days (I think I aged out of their demographic years ago), but every once in a while they hit on something that will entertain you for an entire afternoon (or three).