That jealousy thing, once again

Every time I feel the need to question or criticize another woman’s work, I ask myself, “Is this a legitimate response or something born out of jealousy.” The “you’re just jealous” trope is such a pervasive one that’s it’s hard not to. But you know what? Jealousy is a legitimate response sometimes. I’m jealous -- a lot. I’m jealous of other women’s resources and opportunities, and I’m jealous that other women’s voices are deemed more important than mine. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

I think that's what I was trying to say here, while being unnecessarily positive about jealousy being a fantastic motivation tool. If I had to write it over, I'd be a little less bootstrap-y. But back to questioning another woman's writing without making it seem like an attack or, ugh, being a "hater," what spawned all of this was a post from a popular blogger (whom I don't feel comfortable naming) on reconciling her need for being seen as an intelligent person while dealing with being recently diagnosed with a mental disorder. I'm pretty sure she understands the implications here, and why those two things are not mutually exclusive, but I was still pretty put off by it, and I'm trying to parse why.

Most of what's been written about women and mental illness has been from a pretty privileged viewpoint. Most women don't get the "but I'm smart" defense -- at least if you're defining smart as educated, degreed, and awarded, which, frankly, is the way most of the western world defines intelligence. From my own experience -- in any situation -- I can only be smart "in spite of." I don't expect people to think I am, and I usually have to prove that I am a reasonably intelligent person "in spite of." I think this is true of all women who don't have class privilege, which, despite its strides to be intersectional, contemporary feminism continues to struggle with class issues. (And race, gender, and sexuality issues, too, no doubt, but for clarity  -- and because it's the "ism" I think I'm most qualified to write about -- I'm sticking to class for now.) I am jealous of women who don't have to be seen as intelligent "in spite of," even if we all experience that to varying degrees simply by being women.